Tuesday, 19 November 2013

WORLD TOILET DAY

As a comedian I am forced to recognize this day... otherwise i would rather sit back and crack jokes with my cousin Terry than subject my fingers to this Herculean task of typing. (I am a painfully slow typist and i use only one finger)
Today is World Toilets Day, no. its not what you think about it something about sanitation. but thats not good for comedy, I have googled it. This day has an awesome name and deserves to be celebrated in equal measure! On that note, here are two toilets I would never want to use.

1) PRISON TOILET
 Right there on top of my list is the Prison toilet. I have never been arrested thank my good manners. But I hear they do not have doors. No, hygiene is not my issue. but a doorless toilet is a place you dont want to be, especially if there is a queue of pressed criminals in front of you hurling threats. It is even worse when you are constipating; which is probable considering the kind of food prisoners are given. But my friend Musa who was arrested last week for impregnanting the chief's daughter who is in form two, told me that it is not that bad. I don't want to confirm that

2) PUBLIC TOILETS
Like anything else public, public touilets cannot be trusted. Notice how they issue toilet papers and soap then charge you money for it? AHA! That was a trick question. now i know who goes to public toilets. Dont worry, I know it was an emergency.... the issue with public toilet is that people judge you when you come out... The people collecting money at the door will give you away. I remember when a friend of mine (a lady whose name i wont mention) shyly coming out of a public toilet in Eldoret only for a young man to add to her embarassment by shouting "Haja kubwa ni twenty bob madam!" (a long call is twenty shillings madam!)

happy toilet day everyone....
 

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